*Spoilers ahead*
If you’re like me then you were waiting with bated breath for Sept 17th to arrive to start watching Season 3 of Sex Education on Netflix. I even had a little watch party for the 1st 2 episodes. I was not disappointed.
The strong, sexual opening decided to get the nudity out of the way from the get-go, before delving into deeper topics, and I kind of appreciated that. It felt like a Game of Thrones move to have this show start off with hyper amounts of nudity for the sake of shock value and then pull away from it once you’ve started to respect the characters more. I view the vulva images Amy peruses as an aside from this since they served the purpose of teaching the viewer (and Amy) about the variations in lip shapes and sizes. Her coming to terms with her “geranium” labia was one of the crowning moments of this season for sure.
So what else caught my attention? This whole season felt like a stroll through my Instagram feed, to be honest, with its focus on female empowerment and women's sexual health, haha. I loved when Maeve suggested to Amy to read Come as You Are, the publicly distributed vulva cupcakes, and Maeve preaching about how sex can be fun and doesn’t have to be focused on orgasm. The introduction of non-binary characters and chest binders was also worthy of a thumbs up. I especially want to give my resounding approval of the intimate scene between her and Isaac, because I haven’t seen an attempted sex scene with someone in a wheelchair since Jimmy was on Degrassi (shout out to Drake for taking the wheelchair rapper gimmick off the show and launching an actual music career instead). I truly appreciate the creators of Sex Education choosing to show as many different sides of sex as possible, what all it can consist of, beyond penetration and beyond the limited PIV male gaze it is so often reduced to on TV and in movies. Even something as simple as Adam and Eric’s kerfuffle over who was going to be a top or bottom when they had sex was refreshing and could be eye opening to young gay or questioning men watching. Teaching people of all ages, but especially teenagers coming of age who may be watching, how to use their fingers, mouths, toys, and role play to expand their definition of sex is a very powerful message for Gen Z to take in. I hope it allows them better access to all of the knowledge the rest of us never had at our disposal.
The fashion in this show forever confuses me with its 80's throwback vibes of florals, bright colors, and mismatched prints. I continuously forget Sex Education is set in current times, until I see a smart phone pop up, and then I'm pulled back to modern day. Another slightly off putting aspect of the show is how Americanized it is for being British. I consume a lot of British media and nothing else feels as Americanized as this, but I know they're doing it to adhere to a larger audience than just the UK and this marketing ploy is probably working. I remember when Degrassi brought in football to try to do this and it epically failed.
As always, I loved Ezra Furman doing the soundtrack and this trans representation only serves to align with the show’s overall values. Having since listened to the whole album, I do like her music from the previous seasons more, but I still find the lyrics for these songs to add another level of nuance to an already exceptionally written show.
Can we just take a moment to revel in how amazing the acting is? Yes, all of the high schoolers are actually in their 20’s, but regardless of age, they clearly know what they are doing. The emotion behind their performances never fails to amaze me and literally brought me to tears 3 times this season. I had to take a break and get into a soothing bath after watching episode 5, because I was so scared of what was going to happen next! I could hardly bear to finish the season for fear of losing one of my favorite characters/actresses (who also helps write the show, might I add).
My only complaint about this season was with Lily’s story. I felt so validated watching her receive her Vaginismus diagnosis from “sex kid”, Otis, in season 1, and watching in season 2 as she explained her dilating practice to her new gf, Ola, but we don’t get that in season 3. I realize I am coming at this as a fellow sufferer here, and not just your average viewer, but I am also approaching this as someone with a writing degree. I really don’t think the ambiguity of her situation with her vagina is a good choice for her story arc. The last we saw, Lily was ecstatic to find that she could insert the smallest dilator, but we haven’t seen them since. All we get of her and Ola’s sex life this season is a rushed montage mash up with them in typical Lily-esque space costumes, with no actual insight into what they are doing. We later learn that Ola wishes they could sometimes just have normal sex without the cosplay and thinks it can be a bit “weird”, which Lily takes great offense to. In my mind, requiring the costumes could be a metaphor for requiring dilators, because a partner can suggest that having sex with someone with Vaginismus is a bit “weird”, but that’s just my English major brain trying to make sense of their dynamic. I think the biggest failing with the writing of this story line lies in the fact that it is never expressly stated that Lily’s Vaginismus may have stemmed from her childhood. We are given insight into a memory where a junior high age Lily was told that her writing was inappropriate, and her mother told her that a proper lady doesn’t write about such things. This sex shaming is a common shared aspect of many of our childhoods among those of us who have this problem. We are told to close off that side of ourselves, figuratively, when we are growing up, so we internalize it and in turn seal off our vaginal openings, literally. Our PC muscles clamp shut at a sign of attempted entry because our fight, flight, or freeze response has been taught to head into action once a perceived threat appears, and sexual thoughts and actions are that threat. In season 1 we were told that Lily just has a controlling personality, but I refuse to believe that is the only factor which caused her Vaginismus and I think that sends a poor message to those watching who may encounter one of us one day and assume we are simply like this due to a flaw in our personalities.
I can, and do, talk about the wonder that is this show for long periods of time. I could go on and on about it, but for now I will just leave it here. I'm excited to see what will become of Otis and Maeve's long distance situation, Jackson and Cal's delayed coupling, Eric and Amy's newfound freedom, and the possibility of Adam and Rahim becoming a thing. I'm glad the show chose to show teens that it's ok being single and finding yourself without being attached to another person. It's always interesting to see what characters will do when they are simply fulfilling their own agenda and not following alongside someone else and their wishes. I mean, look what happened to Mr. Groff. Perhaps him and his son can bond in season 4 over their shared rejection by the ones they loved.
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