In light of the upcoming holiday, I wanted to write some product reviews to help you prepare for a sexy night in, alone or partnered. For some this holiday is about romance, roses, chocolate, a candle lit dinner, a sweet card, or watching a sappy movie. For others, it's about lingerie, boudoir photos, or a loooong night of hooking up. With the global pandemic still upon us, I think more people will be choosing to stay in this year and take advantage of some one on one, or single time, in bed (or elsewhere). I'd like to offer up some feedback on products I have tried in case you want to give them a shot yourself. These can be truly helpful for those of us with dyspareunia and let's face it, we all deserve a sexy night in!
If you haven't heard of it yet, the OhNut can really come in handy for allowing easier penetrative sex. This rubbery ring is made of a unique, lifelike material, meant to be worn as a bumper at the bottom of whatever you're inserting to make the penetration less deep. The set comes with four stackable rings so you can decide how many to put on at a time (it's recommended to start with three). I wasn't sure if this device would do anything for me since my pain is at the entrance, not deep inside, but it truly has helped me enjoy sex more! The OhNut allows you to try positions that wouldn't be possible without it because it limits the depth of the insertion. I was pretty much sticking to two positions before using it because they were the only ones I could tolerate, but using the OhNut makes it possible to be on top of a longer partner since he can't go all of the way in. Some guys do get wider at the base as well, so if you are struggling with the stretch at the bottom this could really help you. We honestly couldn't even tell that the bumper was there and I quickly decided I only require one. It can of course be put around a dilator, dildo, or vibrator, too. As you can see in the picture above, they are currently doing a Valentine's Bundle for $95 that comes with a sex journal, Uberlube silicone lubricant, a vinyl sticker, and an OhNut of your choice, so it's a great time to place an order! There are now two different colors (aloe and jade) and two width options (standard and wider) for purchase, so you have a variety to choose from. Featured below is my "wider" OhNut being stretched so you can see how much give it has. I would suggest ordering this bigger one if you don't want to purchase two sizes because it just sits around the penis or object (it doesn't need to be tight). Better to be safe and comfy than have it be too constricting for your partner. So whether you are Menopausal, have a low cervix, or suffer from from Vaginismus or Vulvodynia, the OhNut can be a real game changer in the bedroom. Use my code KRISTA1984 for a discount at check out!
Another product I highly recommend for a more comfortable evening, if you have nerve pain is Desert Harvest's Releveum, a cream with 4% Lidocaine to help numb the painful area. This stuff is great if you suffer from Lichen Sclerosus, Pudendal Neuralgia, Vulvodynia, or any other condition which affects the nerves topically. Since I have a tilted and twisted pelvis, I have nerve pain on the left side of my vagina that makes penetration of pretty much any size painful. I take this a tiny bit of this cream on the tip of my finger, insert it and rub it in, 15 minutes before insertion so it has time to do its magic. This allows my PC muscle to relax, since it isn't reacting to searing nerve pain, so that insertion is painless and movement possible. Before trying this product even the slowest, slighting motion was uncomfortable for me and I would have to stop. Now that I use Releveum I can pick up the pace and go for a much longer session, bringing me that much closer to my ultimate goal of finishing. It lasts from 4-6 hours, but can be reapplied after just 3. You can see on the chart below that Desert Harvest also carries an Aloe Gele and Aloe Glide lubricant which is recommended for those with pain. I pair Releveum with Aloe Glide myself, but since this lubricant is water based it will dry up if you are moving a bunch, so I often follow it up with a silicone lubricant, like Fuck Water, for the PIV portion.
The next product is for those who are not looking to experiment with penetration. I have been learning about all different types of sex toys over the last several months, and there are so many which don't need to be inserted internally at all, but this one is also hands free. Bullets and womanizers for clitoral stimulation are pretty common, but I had never seen a rideable vibrator like this before. The idea with the Ruby Glow Dusk is you can sit on it and experience stimulation to the clitoris AND vaginal opening, all with one toy! The toy was a bit smaller than I had envisioned it being, and so far I've only used it once through underwear, but it can be used wet or dry. It's up to you how to position it for the most pleasure, but you can try placing it on a pillow, the bed, couch, or wherever. You can try sitting straight on it or making your legs straight and sliding over it, to replicate outercourse. What's really cool and original about this toy is that it has 2 separate buttons for each end so you can have a different vibration style on each side! I didn't realize this until after I finished, haha, so I haven't put it into practice yet, but it certainly leaves room for a lot of exploring. The best part about this toy is that it's relatively cheap for a high quality, silicone toy, and can be ordered in the US and the UK.
No matter what you choose to do, make sure you're prepped and ready for a night (or day) of fun with the proper tools to make you feel the most comfortable. Spoken from experience, don't put too much pressure on yourself about making your night "the one" for great sex. Putting yourself on a timeline for overcoming doesn't tend to end well. Just try to have a good time and do what brings you pleasure. Having a non-goal oriented evening leaves you open to a lovely time with no expectations, just exploration of bodies and fun. I wish you all a stress free, frolicking good V-Day!